Thoughts on Forgiveness

I have been doing a lot of soul searching and reading about what forgiveness is and what it isn't. The Bible tells us to forgive 70 times 7 times. That is about how many times are human nature needs to be reminded to forgive. It is so true that we can get to a point where we say, I forgive you, and then something happens and the hurts flare back up and we need to remember that we have already let that one go and forgive again.

Forgiveness is:
letting go of the anger that is only tearing me up inside
it is not forgetting about what happened.

Forgiveness is:
letting go of the judgment in my heart and allowing God's judgment to stand

Forgiveness is not:
reconciliation. It takes two to reconcile but only one to forgive.

Forgiveness is not condoning an action.

Forgiveness is not taking away the consequences of the action.

In order to move on and live the life that God has planned for me I need his strength to forgive. I need his strength not to become bitter.

As I near the three month mark of Tonia's death I find myself praying to continue my journey toward forgiveness; to JC and his friends, to family members who have said bitter things, and to others who have sometimes unknowingly hurt me during their grief process.

I am missing Tonia as I look at the leaves changing and remembering our walks at the Dunes. We has so much fun kicking up the leaves and rolling down the sand dunes. Walking in the woods was always so peaceful.

God said that there is a season for everything: a time to laugh and a time to cry. I just never realized that sometimes it is the season for both at the same time. I am watching Tonia's puppy, Pixie, who has joined our home. She is ALL puppy. Knocking everything over, chewing on every bone I give her and jumping on my lap, even when my computer is there first! She makes me laugh. I will be crying and she jumps up and tries to lick off all of my tears! She tears around the house having a surge of energy and everyone gets out of her way. How can I not laugh? Tonia would have been clapping her hands and laughing hysterically at her antics.

So life goes on and I continue to pray that God comforts me, teaches me, and uses me for His purposes. The journey of forgiveness is an ongoing one but in the end I know the outcome. God wins! In Heaven my soul will be at peace and I will be dancing and singing with my Father.

May God's peace fill your heart and may you see the world through His eyes!

I Love You!

Sermon we heard the morning Tonia died: Freedom Through Forgiveness by Warren Sullivan